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Monday, October 31, 2005

BOO! Scary Halloween Rant!

Halloween is not my favorite holiday. The only good thing about Halloween, ever, has been the chance to be someone else. Well, guess what? I'm an adult and adults don't do that. I don't have kids and this is a children's holiday. I don't have any opportunity to dress up like anything except that I dressed up like a burrito this afternoon in order to get free food at Chipotle. If I could choose to be anything for Halloween, it would not be a Chipotle burrito. Or, if I did decide to be a Chipotle burrito for Halloween, it would not be just a lame-ass foil piece worn over my shirt.

Anyway, I don't like having candy in the house. If there is candy in the house, it calls to me. It says "eat me, eat me." And I do. So, to solve this problem, Dave and I purchased candy that we don't like. The problem? We like almost all candy and the candy that we don't like is the candy that nobody likes. So, we bought Mary Janes, Necco Wafers, Almond Joy, and Payday. Yuck. In a pinch, I could probably scarf down a Payday. But I won't. I wanted to get Good & Plenty, but apparently they're so gross that they don't even bother making fun size versions of them anymore.

When you think about it... how weird is it anyway? Little kids are going to knock on my door tonight and ask for candy. WTF? I have to go out and purchase candy for these little buggers. Really think about it - is that not the strangest thing ever?? I don't even know these kids! And some of them don't even say "Trick or Treat" or "Thank you." If it were up to Dave, I think we'd sit inside with the lights out.

And what is UP with the decorations? When I was little, you bought ONE PUMPKIN! You carved it, put a candle in it and that was IT. My neighbors have lights and blow up things and crap that make noise. Once again, WTF? What is up with the over-decorating? I don't have time for that crap.

Ok, off to climb.

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