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Friday, June 4, 2010

A Little Bit of Self-Loathing

The original plan was that since we were going to be out of town this past weekend, I was not going to force myself to run.  We were scuba diving and running and diving don't mix (there is nitrogen dissolved in your blood from diving, and when you run you shake it up like you're shaking a can of soda).  So, the only day I could have run was really Tuesday, and I decided that if I didn't run Tuesday, I was going to forgive myself, since I always get my runs in, I never skip my runs.  I force myself to run in even the most horrible circumstances.

So, we were down in Florida, and we slept in because we'd gotten up early to dive and we were, quite frankly, exhausted.  We were up around 8:30 or so, which isn't even that late, but in Florida it was already 89 degrees.  I chose to let it go, and I spent the day with my in-laws with no run.

Our plane got in on Tuesday and we were home pretty late.  Didn't get up early, and then I had a hair appointment after work.  By the time I got home, it was 8pm, and I decided no biggie, I can run Thursday.  Let's just ignore the fact that Wednesday was National Running Day.

Thursday...  Still didn't get up early, this time for no real reason, because I knew I could run in the evening.  Then, Todd found out he was working, so we had to get up to York, PA to pick up our cat from the awesome friend who was watching him and be back before his work started.  Then, once again, it was 8:30 when we got home.  I maybe could have run?  I don't know.

This morning, I'm just lazy.  I should have gotten up and I didn't.  And I'm mad at myself.  I ran on Friday before we left for Florida, so today is one week since I've run.  I feel out of it.  And I feel mad.  Lazy.  Upset.  Off the wagon.  And - on top of that - I've been eating.  Oh, I've been eating.


The good news is that I have  to run tomorrow because my running group will be expecting me to be there.  But, I'm still really angry at myself.


Staci Dombroski said...

Have a great run tomorrow! Don't beat yourself up about it :) Have a great weekend!

onelittletrigirl said...

Don't beat yourself up too much- life happens!!!

marathonmaiden said...

don't get too down. this will just give you time to rest up before beasting your next runs :)

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